I Still Write On Medium Without Paying Anything
Looking back, I tried so hard, believed so innocently, and cared so emotionally that someday I could be a writer who dominates his/her own words. While genuinely being myself, I can still make a living, a place to write and sleep, and enough money for basic needs.
During the pursuit of fame in writing (a real motive deep down in every self-claimed writer’s heart,) I took outrageously expensive writing courses, shared my past that I never thought of touching again, isolated my life, went for innuendo online dates, and minimalized myself to express my writing potential.
Then, I finally realized- it’s not an era of getting what we want through persistently hard work anymore. It’s 60% fate, 90% social connection, and 100% pain. We keep moving on by reading motivational quotes, like, “Success is failing seven times but still standing up the eighth.”
I still love writing but now I have no boundaries of what to write anymore: I randomly write new lyrics for songs I love and record the disastrous for my pleasure; I scribble down either positive or negative life perspectives here and there; I go back to work which I don’t enjoy but I can nail it effortlessly; I read extensively and attend school in my spare time.
I don’t regret that year I “lost myself” in the viewers, comments, followers, and SEO…, and relived the depression relapse with oversensitive compassion. I see what I care, love, and live for more clearly.
I no longer care to be taken for granted by my family.
I love being brave enough to bear with different life perspectives.
I live for my own life goal, putting myself into it and recognizing the worth of each piece of knowledge poured out in this information overload society.
